This post is dedicated to the men and women of our United States Military.  

From one former Vet to another, I SALUTE you!

We’ll since we talk about love it’s only right we discuss ways to show love to the men and women of the military.

1. No Dear John Letters Please

Why wait until he/she is overseas to break up with them?  They have the weight of the world on their shoulders.  Can we choose a better time people.  Thats just low, real low!

2. Cards, Letters, Gifts, and Care Packages

If you only knew how a card or letter from a loved one, hell…..even someone you don’t know makes it easier to get through the tough moments.  You ever have that feeling of just knowing someone really loves you and cares about you.  Send letters and care packages!

3. Donate your old Cell Phone/Send a Calling Card

We change out cell phones like we change socks these days.  Don’t toss that phone in the garbage, help a troop.

4. Nonprofit Organization

Consider making some type of donation to a nonprofit organization geared towards helping our troops.  There are more than 300 nonprofit organizations dedicated to helping our troops and their families listed on the America Supports You website.

These alarms can be both good and bad.  For example, on a few occasions the person you’ve been dating has mentioned in conversation that they really don’t care for children.  You notice at a birthday party full of kids your significant other doesn’t seem comfortable and is in your ear to leave.  Are we starting to notice a trend here?  Chances are, this could be a cause for concern when you begin thinking of children.

Most people probably overlook this thinking no big deal when really this has problem written all over it.  If you’re from a big family and looking to have a few children of your own this is something to really consider.  This is what we call a red flag.  Your concerns about this should be addressed immediately preceding a decision to continue or move on without this person.  More often than not, we ignore these alarms and find ourselves getting involved with unsuitable partners or learn later that this person has faults that we don’t care to deal with.

“We don’t talk like we use to”

“The intimacy we use to have is gone”

There are variying views on what the blueprint for a healthy relationship should consist of.  These thoughts might help, but can difficult times in relationships really be avoided.

I think not!  The key to a happy relationship could be accepting that some unhappy times are unavoidable.

Researchers from California State University, North Ridge and Virginia Tech say that “accepting problems  is better than striving for perfection.”  They blame modern love stories and cultural fairy tales for enabling the myth that the enjoyment of a perfect relationship is possible if we fight for it.

With enough effort,  we can achieve a state of complete happiness.  This is a myth!  This belief can eventually cause people to believe that with enough effort they can eliminate  suffering.  I call this the gerbil in the wheel syndrome.  Many couples are just spinning their wheels in a relationship that isn’t healthy.  This is an impractical aim in relationships, and striving to achieve  it can lead people  to feel they have failed.

So, what should couples do?  They can build strengths, such as understanding and communication in their relationship.  It’s ok to have disagreements.  Assure your mate that just because we don’t agree on something, I still love you, support you.  This will help to coupe in the  hard times and appreciate the good times.

My name is Brian, but you can call me  “ladieslove.” I share relationship advice.  Initially, I never really considered myself an expert in love but would always find myself being presented with “what would you do if you were in this situation” type questions.  Turns out that my personal experiences with the opposite sex, or just people in general has helped me help others.  If you’re blessed with the ability to give, I say share!

Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth.  ~Mohammed Ali

My promise to you….I will ALWAYS be honest, and forthright in my comments with respect to your situations. I won’t pacify you or tell you what you think you want to hear.  I now present to you an opportunity to help others.  I encourage you to tell your story, ask a question, or offer your advice.